As a mum, when you start to doubt your abilities at work especially if you were a high achiever before motherhood happened and now you are lagging behind or slow in delivering tasks, some of your workplace ‘habits’ that can cause this low self-confidence include:
1. Constantly comparing yourself to your colleagues
Especially if they are single or even a mother like you. You don’t know their family dynamics or support they have, Instead:
- Focus on your strengths, talents and accomplishments
- Celebrate other people
- Learn to compete with yourself instead of others.
- Study and Learn from other people’s successes
2. Focusing on what your colleagues think
- Stop Spending too much time looking for external validation, only you can understand what you have to sacrifice to make things work
- Keep perspective and focus on what matters
- Stop overthinking
- Seek constructive feedback from your superiors
3. Dwelling on your mistakes at work
- We all make mistakes, and as a mom you might make more than the usual pre-motherhood, you need to let it go and move on. You can’t change the past.
- Dwelling on past wrongdoings will eat away at your self-confidence
- Remember you’re not a collection of your worst mistakes. You need to forgive yourself.
4. Not celebrating your small wins
Only you can understand what you have to sacrifice to make things work as a mum, so celebrate the small wins when it happens,
- Share it with people you love
- Write a thank-you note to someone who helped you accomplish a win
- Reward yourself with achieving small goals
- Write it down
- Have a celebratory mantra and repeat it
5. Imposter Syndrome
Impostor syndrome refers to an internal experience of believing that you are not as competent as others perceive you to be. instead
- Pay attention to your language choices, both when you’re talking to other people and when you’re talking to yourself
- Track and measure your successes
- Separate feelings from fact. There are times you’ll feel stupid. Realize that just because you may feel stupid, doesn’t mean you are.
Not Asking For Help
Because you think asking for help may project that you are struggling at work. NO! You would alienate yourself!
- As a mum you need all the help and support you can get, not just from work tasks, but to perform optimally. So ask.
- See your boss and colleagues as your team player and take small steps toward true partnerships that would work for you.
These ‘habits’ might be hard to overcome but if you can identify them and become intentional about replacing them, you would begin to realize how much of a kick-ass woman you are.
